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A Free Book Conference!

30/4/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
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I had written a great big long blog post and scheduled it... but when it published, it all disappeared. I'm l'annoyed!

Anyway, the point is, there is a virtual conference going on, organized by the fantastic folks at Renaissance Press. These are the lovely peeps, who focus on Canadian and own-voice authors, who published Daughters of Britain and Skylark. I have loved working them, and I'm excited about this conference.

I've applied to be a reader and a panellist, and I'll keep you updated on whether and when these things are happening.

They're going to have a vendor's section and everything, and that's pretty awesome.

Anyway, mark the date!  Coming to an internet near you!

Incidentally, if you're interested in participating, you can really all the details and the links to apply here. Deadline for applications is May 7.

​See you soon!
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Stumbling Onward

29/4/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
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This is just such a cool image. I found it on wallpaperaccess.com.
I didn't go for a run yesterday. Or a walk. Nor did I work out this morning. I'm not happy with me currently.

Still, I'm up... even if it's super late because dragging myself out of bed was difficult. I at my computer, having had breakfast, with my coffee and a plan for today's work. That's something. Even if that something is my simply floundering around, stumbling forward. I think, give the world at the moment, that it's all I can do, and I ought to cut myself some slack.

I'm still mad at myself, though.

I'm also really missing the gym.  I miss stepping away from my office desk, going outside for a little bit, and then lifting heavy things for a while. I miss the feeling of strength and affirmation I got every time I hit the gym. I miss training. I miss seeing my friends, and learning to fight with them. I miss punching and kicking something solid. I want to get a heavy bag to hang up somewhere. But I have no where to hang it, and no space to work with it at any rate.

I've been thinking about maybe having a stand for it in the teeny tiny backyard we have here, and taking the bag down to the basement at the end of each session. Weightlifting and fight training all in one session.  But, and here's the real issue, I don't really have the funds to buy a stand and bag. Still, I'm looking into it, because I really, really, REALLY miss training and I really, really, REALLY need to punch something.

If I don't soon, I might just cry.

Anyway, that's where I am right now. My shoulders sit permanently up around my ears because I've no way to work out my anxieties in the way I'm used to, and I'm also irritated with myself for not doing the things I meant to.

*grumbles*

I've been having really vivd dreams, though, so that's a plus... I guess?

Right, I should go and attempt normalcy.

​Ciao!
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My Talented Friends

28/4/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
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Found this beauty on .picswalls.com.
So, I have a long blog post brewing about something I've been mulling over the past couple of days, but I just don't have the spoons, as it were, to deal with it right now, so I'm going to use this time and space to shine a light on my amazingly talented friends.

First up, is wholesome human, fellow geek, and one of my martial arts students who has become a good friend, Kaylee. Kaylee is posting her gorgeous pieces on Instagram (and Facebook) under the name Art From the Boonies. She's stupid talented, and I'm very jealous of her painting ability. Please follow the links above, and either give her a follow or her page a like, depending on which platform you prefer.

I don't have her permission to repost any of her art here, but she does have a website, in case you'd like to check it out and don't want to hit up either of the afore-mentioned platforms.

Another good friend of mine, Caroline, is also an incredibly talented artist. She works mainly in charcoal/pencil, and holy hell are her pieces incredibly good.  She recently created a Facebook page for her work, and I highly recommend you check her stuff out. I'm ridiculously impressed with her. It takes a lot of work to get that good.

Of course, I couldn't do one of these and not mention Nathan Frechette, one of the co-founders of Renaissance Press, who is now also an Aurora Award nominee for his fabulous book covers.

Then there's all my stupidly talented and hard working writer friends. Marie Bilodeau, of course, Evan May, Derek Künsken, Cait Gordon, Éric Desmarais (who also roasts a line of fabulous coffees), and so many others I love but haven't listed here.

I am surrounded by incredibly talented, hardworking people whom I love and aspire to be more like. They're wonderful, and I'm always impressed by them. Check them out. You won't be sorry.

​Now I'm off to get work done. But first:

30 Day Song Challenge - Day 26

A Song That Makes You Want to Fall in Love
Not going to lie, but my first reaction to this prompt was, "Oh, fuck off." But i have to admit, this song is really sweet.

Ciao!
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A Productive Day Already

28/4/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
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Could you imagine? Nabbed this piece from wallpapersafari.com.
This morning, I headed out early to go to Ottawa's T & T Asian Supermarket to do some much-needed grocery shopping. There's a party happening tomorrow... there'll only be two of us, because, well, the plague, but there's still a party happening, and I intend to cook dinner for it. It's going to be an experiment that might not work, but I'm going to give it a shot all the same.

T & T, incidentally, was not taking any chances. There was a greeter at the door with a temperature scanner, who also provided a generous pump of hand sanitizer before you were allowed in. I would like you all to know that my body temperature this morning was roughly 33.33 Celsius. The poor attendant had to take the temperature on my forearm, as my forehead was not registering any heat whatsoever.

The wind was cold, and I'd been out in it for a while, as you are when you take the bus anywhere, so my skin was clearly cold. It's not at all because I'm a vampire and therefore had no temperature to record.

Nope. Not I.

In any case, for a moment I thought I'd be turned away for having a temperature. Not that I feel unwell, but these small, nonsensical anxieties that pop into my head fairly frequently. Gladly, I didn't. I took my pump of sanitizer and happily shopped.

I really appreciate T & T taking these precautions. While it feels really weird, I also had a wonderful, stress free shop. I wasn't worried about anyone in the store being ill, and I was much less worried about myself being the plague carrier. I kept my mask on just in case, but all in all, it was a very pleasant morning.

Everything was purchased and I returned home shortly after 10:00 this morning. This was my biggest task of the day, and I'm really glad I got it out of the way quickly. Now I can focus on editing, writing, practicing French and playing the guitar, which are the other tasks I have for today.

Speaking of daily tasks, I somehow managed to do all of my to-do list yesterday, even though I had given myself permission to not do so. I wrote (my blog post, the blog post for Black Gate Magazine, and my daily 1K on my manuscript), edited, practiced French and guitar, all before my usual bedtime.

It was a good day, and I'm surprised and please with myself for managing it. I have struggled so hard with getting the things done that I wanted to get done of late, and no doubt I will struggle again, but for now, I'm doing okay, and I'm pleased.

Right, I'm off to do more work.

​But first: 

30 Day Song Challenge - Day 19

A Song That Makes You Think About Life
I have no smart remark here. This is just one of those songs.

​Ciao!
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It Was Magical

28/4/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
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Found this gorgeous piece on wallpapermemory.com.
This morning I went for a long walk.

I headed out just after seven, and didn't get back in until about eight-thirty or so this morning. At first, i intended just to explore a nearby neighbourhood, but I find a path between two houses, and then found myself in this gorgeous green space.

Not having all that much to do today, I decided to follow it as far as it would take me. I found myself in a magical wooded area, with huge tress, and squirrels, and chipmunks, and birds of all kinds. Trilliums were in bloom. The sun came through the trees at an angle, lighting the ground with golden lines and purple shadows. I followed still deeper, happily lost. I stumbled across a woodpecker, tearing apart a stump in search of breakfast. I was not two feet from the bird, and it didn't fly away. I just stood there and watched it, listening to the sounds of the breeze in the trees and birds...

Gods, it was beautiful.

I stayed out longer than I intended to, but was so happily absorbed in this little slice of paradise that I didn't really mind. I did get a bit grumpy when other folks started showing up, though.

Every time I go into a wooded area, I can feel my whole body just... relax. Like it's melting away the stress and aggravation.

I don't think I was meant to be in a city. I'm holding out for a house in the country, on a large plot of land that is mostly forested, with some room for my horses, and a small homestead.

Sigh.

​Alright, I have work to do. But first:

30 Day Song Challenge - Day 14

a Song You Would Like Played at Your Wedding
Chances of a wedding are almost nil (not interested in weddings), and I've honestly given zero thought to this topic at all. Some folks have their weddings all figured out by the time they've turned 15. I'm not one of those folks. So, this song isn't something I'd like played at my wedding, but it is one that I think describes love's patience and caring well.

It wouldn't be the worst song to dance to at a wedding... right?

Okay, I have to go.

​Ciao!

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Now What?

28/4/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
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I know I've used this image before, but I love it so much. It reminds me of the daemon ships from my ski fi, Skylark. Here, it is either landing or lifting off from their British Columbia site, in my head. I found it on getwallpapers.com.
I was supposed to run this morning. That didn't happen. That's alright. I'll see if I can go for a walk after dinner. That should be nice.

Things are okay right now. Not great. Just okay.

I edited a bunch of videos yesterday, and edited two chapters for my friend's project.  Today, I don't really have a plan. I'm not sure what to do with my morning time. I didn't really think about much other than trying to get my videos edited and caught up.

Perhaps I should attempt to write, and edit more of my friend's stuff this afternoon, just so that the part of my schedule (editing) doesn't change all that much. I'm not dealing with change all that well of late.

In happy news, it's bright and sunny out today, with a high to be 13C or so. That'll be nice.

Rain for the rest of the week.

But today will be nice.

Since my mind is blanking so damned hard, I'm off to try and come up with some work for myself.

​Ciao!
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Thoughts After the Weekend

27/4/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
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I think this is such a pleasing image. Found it on 1001freedownloads.com.
Quarantine day... lost count.

I'm slowly coming out of my weird freeze. It's been a fight, and I've had to take it slowly. I tried jumping in, foot first. It failed spectacularly. I managed to keep a schedule for maybe two or three days at a time, which was immediately followed with a burnout so deep and dark, it would take me a week or more to climb back to the light.

Last week, I started out slowly with editing the videos of me teaching martial arts (which I had neglected for almost a month) to upload for my students to reference whenever they want and also editing the manuscript of someone who should already have it back by now. She's been extremely good at not constantly asking for news, though surely she must be dying for some. Thank you, incidentally, for your patience.

I even managed to practice the guitar a bit (and got terribly sunburnt while practicing outside on Saturday. I wasn't even out that long. Alas, just a few moments in the spring sun in Canada is enough to render my pasty flesh the same hue as a cooked lobster). That one made me the happiest, actually.

As you know, if you've been keeping up on the blog posts, I signed up for Skillshare to learn how to paint in oils. I decided that, while I wait for my painting supplies to come in, I'd check out what they offered for guitar as well. I found a teacher I quite like, and went through the first lesson. I came away from the first lesson with a few riffs which... I mean.... many of them don't quite work on acoustic, but some do, and I'm pleased to be learning them. It made me feel likeI could actually play. After just one lesson.

And now I want an electric guitar.

There are other things taking the guitar lesson taught me. The first is that I think I learn best with a teacher. It would be super cool if I could say 'self-taught' but my brain requires the structure and instruction that having a teacher supplies. It also really helps to have a visual example to observe and copy.

With this experience, I'm really looking forward to starting my fine art adventure on Skillshare. Once I feel comfortable going out on my own with oil-painting, I'll be looking into clay sculpture. And also leather working and wood working as well.

I've missed music lessons. I've missed art lessons.

I've missed creating beautiful things with my hands.

One thing at a time, though. Fridays are, for now, my lesson days. Guitar lessons, painting lessons (when my supplies arrive)... it's almost as if I've regressed to high school.

Skillshare even gives you homework.

I'm almost forty and I'm doing homework.

I'm okay with this.

Anyway, 
it was a horrid time in my life, and to be honest, I don't remember much of it (my brain has put a big ol' wall up), but I do remember that music and art was what saved me, and now, when I feel like I'm drowning once again, I find myself reaching for the same.

This morning, I did a quick workout before settling at my computer to start the day's work. It is a small thing, but made me feel better for doing it. I might not be able to keep it up, but I'll try. If all goes well tomorrow, I will be going for a run (or attempt a run. I'm woefully out of practice). If I can manage that for a few days, maybe it'll become habit again, and I'll be fitter and healthier by the end of this thing.

I'm trying to be gentle with myself if I do fail at this, though. It's been a weirdly difficult time, I'm sure you can all agree.

Right, I'm off to get some work done. I shall see you all tomorrow.

​Ciao!
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    S.M. Carrière, a Celtic Studies enthusiast, writes fiction.  And this blog.

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