What? A second blog post in as many days? Listen, hush. Yesterday was a holiday, so it was a scheduled post I wrote ages ago. Today is the actual first day back at work, so you get a proper blog post.
I’m not going to lie, it’s been a pretty rough week leading up to today. I struggled with a migraine for much of last week, and so got nothing I wanted done at all. I’m quite far behind in my writing. I promised myself I’d catch up by Christmas, but alas, did not. I am blaming my migraine for that too, even though that happened after Christmas. So, I’m starting this new year fresh…ish. I’m using this first week of the year to settle back into my regular routine, catch up to where I should have been as of today, and throw in some bonuses.
Before I get into my goals for this coming year, I have a happy announcement! If you were looking for ways to support me (you know, other that your already incredible emotional support) in the upcoming months, you can! As of last night, my monthly subscription thingy has gone live. It’s just the one tier at $1.00 a month (that’s in Canadian dollars, in case anyone is wondering) for now, as I don’t have much time to devote to this (yet), and I don’t feel like I can deliver much more than that amount’s worth of material in a month for you.
So far, monthly subscribers will have access to something free in my shop… it’s the only thing in my shop as of now… and you’ll be getting an extra blog post a month, plus early access to whatever I write for my own platforms first. Except for this blog post. The thing only launched last night, after all. Anyway, if you can spare the time and funds, please subscribe. But no not, and I mean this, do not if you can’t. You must look after you first. Fill your own cup, and then you can think about filling others’. There are plenty of ways you can support a creative, most of them free, and I’m grateful for it all. Don’t you dare feel bad! Okay? Okay.
Writing
- Get an answer on The Lioness of Shara Mountain. I haven’t heard from the publisher yet. If the manuscript is rejected, I have to decide what to do with it. Should I shelve it? Self-publish? Try to acquire an agent for it? I’m not sure yet. The first step, however, is getting an answer on it. This one’s easy. It’s out of my hands, so I don’t have to actually do anything about it. Because I can’t. *flips hair sassily* Publishing.
- Complete Book Three of The Three Worlds War. As of the writing of this, I’m just shy of a quarter of the way through. I should get it finished by the middle of the year.
- Start and finish a new title - The Tournament. I want to write this book and then adapt it into a stage play. First thing’s first, though, is to write the damned thing. I can think about adapting it later. The goal - write the novel. The stage play is for another year, perhaps.
- Create and launch my monthly subscription. This one’s a cheat. I’ve already done it. Hey, it’s sometimes nice to cross something off your to-do list early on, okay? Don’t judge.
- Try to get the number of subscribers to 25. That might seem like a very small number for a year’s worth of effort. There are two reasons for this: the first is that I’ll be very lucky if anyone signs up at all, and the second is that I know these things take time. I have a very small following of wonderful readers (thank you, by the way!), and that means getting known by a larger group, and having anyone from that larger group want to subscribe is going to be an uphill battle. 25 may even be too large for someone just starting out, especially since there isn’t that much on offer, and I’m so bloody awful at self-promotion. We’ll see.
- Eat enough. I know I’ve been sinking into old habits of not eating enough, and then collapsing into a binge (though my binges have been healthier of late) every so often. I have to ensure that I’m eating enough. I’m switching to a protein-focussed diet. I’ve been doing some reading, and it’s supposed to help ‘mature’ (snicker) women and women suffering from hormonal issues to maintain decent muscle mass.
- Get to unassisted pull-ups. Damn it, this was my goal last year and I failed so hard. This will be the year I do it. I have some supplies I need to pick up (work out rings), but I’m going to get so strong.
- Get to a full split. This was not on my list last year. I know I need to work on my flexibility. I’ve never been able to do the splits, and I’ll try for it this year. I need some equipment to help (yoga blocks so I can hold myself upright, for example).
- Get back into weight training. I have all the equipment that I need for the level I’m at. What I lack is the will. The thing is, I really like feeling strong, and get stroppy with myself when I’m being lazy, so I have really no excuse.
- Do more yoga. Okay, this ties into the flexibility thing, but also my mental health. Yoga is gentle, it doesn’t take very long, and there are plenty of free resources to get me going. I’ll be focussing on yoga for relief of lower back and hip pain, because that’s where I hurt the most pretty much all the time.
- Meditate more. I suck at meditation. I’m no good at it. My brain does not, will not, and cannot be still. I figure if I start out slowly, with some of the guided meditations I have on a free app (I’m not paying for anything I don’t have to. In this economy? Are you mad?), I should be okay. It’ll also help with my stress, which I’ve been terrible at managing. Chocolate is not a management strategy.
- Recommit to learning French. This has been off and on for the past few years. I can understand a lot, but speaking is hard, and active listening is exhausting. I would like to be able to listen and understand without having to do the translating in my brain.
- Pick up my guitar again. I started lessons and stopped. I don’t have an awful lot of time, so this might have to go, but for now, I desperately miss making music. And learning is good for the brain. I need to start up again. How will I manage with so much already? I don’t know. Man, I hope my writing takes off and I can reduce my time at the office some.
- Stop isolating. This is a big one for me. Which is why I’ve buried it here. The last couple of years were stressful and difficult. When I’m stressed or overstimulated, I shut down, withdraw and hide. It’s all part of a coping strategy related to my CPTSD, or so said my therapist when I had one. It can be good, but done to the extreme, like I tend to, it’s actually very harmful. I felt it when I went to a friend’s Christmas party this year. I very nearly had an anxiety attack at the door, because it had been so long since I’d been near a group of people purely in a social setting (it’s always been my martial arts crew, and they’re safe - if that makes sense). There were many events that I wish I could have attended, but I was unable to - not for financial or scheduling reasons, but because the very thought of being around people drove my adrenaline through the roof. I couldn’t cope with the idea. I even got so worked up over one that I ended up throwing up. That was cool (it was not cool). The problem with isolating is that each successive occurrence makes it harder and harder to get back out and be social. So, this year, I’m going to try to force myself out into the world more… and hope I don’t have a complete breakdown.
As always, I’m trying to be gentle with myself (hence the no recapping of last year’s goals). I have a terrible habit of expecting too much and then being quite awful to myself when I inevitably fail. Be kind to yourselves, too!
Anyway, if you’ve made it this far into my overly long post, thanks so much for sticking with it. And thanks for reading at all, and thanks for all your support over the years, even when I wasn’t producing anything. I mean it. It’s been a huge help having you here, even if only virtually. With some pretty exciting projects lined up for the future, I hope your patience with me will be rewarded. You’re all wonderful.
Ciao!