Good morning, Readers!

A popular thing I see every so often is, instead of or in addition to New Year's resolutions/goals, a word is picked. This word is something to live by for the rest of the year. A few years ago, I chose the word courage. I was afraid. I was afraid of putting myself out there. Afraid to take a stand. Afraid to call myself by the things I'd had, quite frankly, earnt, like 'writer' for example. Afraid of failing to the point that I wouldn't even try.

I haven't picked a word in a while, and figured this was the year to do it again. I mean, after my expansive list of goals I posted last week, what's one more thing, right?

​This year, my word is this:

I spent the majority of my life believing that I didn't deserve anything. I didn't deserve a good job. I didn't deserve friends or affection or love. I didn't deserve my dream career.

Well fuck that.

I do deserve those things. I am worthy of those things.

This year is the year I fight against my innate self-rejection.

I am worthy of the deep, true friendships I have and may develop.

I am ​worthy of love.

I am worthy of respect.

I am worthy of a career as a writer.

I am a worthy martial artist and martial arts instructor.

This year, I resolve to stop holding myself back because I've somehow convinced myself I am not good enough for the nice things in life; for the things I want. I am good enough. I am worthy.

Perhaps, by this time next year, I'll have managed to break the cycle that tells me I am not. And maybe I'll stop holding myself back. And maybe, I'll start to see some of my dreams come true.

So, that's my word for 2021. That's something I'll be spending the year focussing on. The fact that I am worthy. And I deserve good things.

For the record, I've had to fight this whole blog post not to mitigate the phrase 'I am worthy.' It's going to take a lot of effort. Luckily, I have the year. Wish me luck.

If you were to choose a word for yourself, what would it be? Leave it in the comments below.

Ciao!

Good morning, Readers!

Here it is at last, the long awaited (by no one in particular, save myself) series in which I do an episode by episode break down of my second viewing of The Untamed. Listen, I do not choose my obsessions idly, okay, but when they happen, they happen.

Right, let's get on with it!

Opening with a suicide in the middle of a battle.

Bold.

You have my attention, The Untamed.

Oh! An injured, pretty man (Boy? Man? I mean, they all look like they're twelve) in white is trying to save the pretty man in red and black, who cast himself off the edge of a precipice. We find out that this man in white is Lan Zhan (Lan Wangji, who will be abbreviated to LWJ from now on. Brevity and all that) and he's trying to save Wei Ying (Wei Wuxian, who will be abbreviated to WWX from  now on).

Ugh, that "Let me go," genuinely breaks my heart. That small, sad smile. The strain on LWJ's face as he tries to hold on... MY HEART!

Oh dear. An angry pretty man (seriously, what is in the water in China?!) in purple kills WWX. His name is Jiang Cheng.

LWJ looks utterly devastated.

Alright, The Untamed, you definitely have my attention.

For reals, though, this is a great opening sequence for twits like me. It plunges you into the action right away, with a genuinely devastating inter-personal moment that has me wondering what the hell happened, why is that man suicidal, why is the other one trying to save him, and why is everyone killing each other like this? Great opening. I could watch it a thousand times.

Change of scene, and we see an older gentleman telling stories to a bunch of young men all dressed the same in a tavern (probably). We find out later that it's a group of Lan Clan cultivators (cultivators are, near as I can tell, magical folks. There are folks with magic, and folks without... I think). It cuts to a mysterious figure tapping a closed fan in the palm of his hand, listening from behind a curtain. This is my second viewing, so that cut makes sense to me now, and I slapped myself hard on the forehead on my second viewing for not piecing it together in the first. It's so obvious. The cut seems random. It isn't. At all.

OOOOOH! The mention of WWX returning brings in ominous clouds... and a random drunk person calling for ghosts as he stumbles down an empty street.

Complete change of scene, and we see WWX, surrounded by talismans on paper, in a room covered in blood. He was, apparently, summoned by one Mo Xuanyu, who sacrifices his body to bring WWX back to life and fulfil his desire for revenge. The thing is, the Mo family don't really know what Mo Xuanyu looks like as an adult (he always wore a mask or powdered his face, we learn), so that he now suddenly has WWX's face doesn't really register to them. This of course, has left me with a thousand questions. Why does WWX have his old face instead of Mo Xuanyu's face? Does the sacrifice of Mo Xuanyu give WWX the former's golden core? Or...  I feel like this is a thing that should be explained.

We find out that Mo Xuanyu is - was - a bastard child of a cultivator, who went to his father's clan (the Jin Clan), only to be exiled. Back at the Mo estate, his cousin abuses him. This cousin makes the mistake of beating the crap out of WWX, thinking it's Mo Xuanyu.

WWX gets his revenge soon, by playing the fool and exposing his cousin's cruelty (the actor playing WWX had too much fun with this scene, I'm sure) to a watching crowd. He happens to do so when cultivators from the Lan Clan - including Lan Sizhui, who proves to be kind and sweet - are there investigating some terrible haunting of the manor; and they're using the talismans WWX devised in his past life to help (despite, we learn, the clans all uniting in their condemnation of the use of such tricks).

The stupid cousin steals one of the cultivator's flags, which happens to make him be possessed by whatever evil is haunting the Mo estate. I mean, play stupid games, you little shit. Then it's Mr. Mo who is possessed. And then Mrs. Mo. And holy shit, they're all fighting each other in the courtyard.

To be honest, some of this particular fight scene had me giggling. There's a lot of highly unnecessary wire work, and then that obviously rubber sword... Oi. Still, it's fun if you don't let those things bother you.

​The young cultivators soon find themselves out of their depth, despite their magical rope.

They shoot a signal into the sky to ask for help (despite WWX's anxious protestations, and assurances that he could solve the problem).

Enter Lan Wangji. Look, I'm not saying that this is one of the most epic entrances of any character I've ever seen, but it's pretty damned close!

Oh hey! It's the pretty man in white from the opening sequence. And oh hey, he subdues the Mos with his magical qin, and discovers that the thing haunting the manor is actually a sword somehow infected with the Stygian Tiger Amulet - the same amulet that was supposedly destroyed sixteen years ago in the battle in which WWX committed suicide/was murdered by Jiang Cheng.

Terrified that LWJ will discover him, because LWJ would know him on sight, WWX flees the scene (but not before stopping to observe LWJ in action for a bit. There's something precious in the watching, and it makes me audibly 'aw.' I am very glad that the only witness to my weakness is my cat). LWJ gives chase, but loses him, and the secret is safe... for now. But LWJ has his suspicions. The voiceover is perfect - just enough longing in there... Another audible "Aw!"

And then we cut to a scene where the mysterious man with the closed fan throws the storyteller (you know, the guy near the beginning, entertaining the cultivators) some money as WWX leaves the Mo estate and the town with a donkey. On WWX's arm are three healed cuts. The Mo family has suffered (presumably they're now dead because of that sword ghost thing). So, that vengeance quest has been completed. There is one more cut, still open, indicating that there is one more person on Mo Xuanyu's hit list, and WWX has no idea who that might be.

And that's the end of the episode.

What I Loved
​
Safe to say that I was hooked from the beginning. You cannot show me a battle scene with a mysterious object of power that everyone is killing each other over, and then someone trying desperately to save a suicidal man, and another determined to see him die, and then the would-be saviour devastated when he fails and expect me not to binge the whole thing as quickly as possible.

Everything about this first episode was designed to hook someone like me in. A battle, a devastating inter-personal tragedy (even if you don't understand it fully yet), a billion unanswered questions, obvious unrealized romance between two of the characters... I mean, come on!

Also... the costumes. OMG THE COSTUMES ARE GORGEOUS.

Also, everyone carries a sword, which makes everyone like, ten thousand times more awesome than if they didn't.

What Could Have Been Better

There isn't a whole lot that would have improved this. Perhaps some better cutting in the scene where all the zombie/puppet Mos are fighting one another so that a few of the more dopey moments are a little better hidden wouldn't be too bad.

​I do have one slightly major gripe, and it has to do with the subtitles.

You see, when the young cultivators are discussing the plan to call their master, they use his title Hanguang Jun (the Light-Bearing Lord) in the original Chinese, rather than his name. They use his name in the subtitles, robbing the audience of the (albeit mild) surprise about who, precisely, the cultivators summoned.  It would have been much better if the subtitles used the title instead of his name as well. Hell, even a translation of the title would have been better. It would have made LWJ's entrance all that more epic, in my opinion.

Overall

I fell in love with the series on the first viewing of the first episode. Watching it again, I'm still desperately in love. What a great way kick off a show.

Well done, everyone. See you back here next week for the second episode.

Good morning, Readers!

With 2020 being an awful trash fire, and 2021 looking like a struggle to pull ourselves out of it, it would probably be a good idea to be gentle with myself this year. So naturally, I've got lofty goals, and far too many of them, but I'm going to try and do them all the same. I've broken them down into a bunch of sections, as they are all different areas of my life that I want to develop.

Let's start shall we?

• Resume my French lessons on Duolingo
• Resume my guitar lessons
• Save enough to get a new Mac because mine is bricking
• Save enough for that adventure vacation I desperately want to do, departure date 2022
• Contribute at least $100 per month to my various savings for a minimum of $1 200 in the year
• Buy a decent blogging camera
• Get a computer desk that fits my space so I can finally use my drafting table

So... that’s it. That’s the list. It’s quite the list, isn’t it? I estimate that I’ll get no more than half done this year, but that’s better than nothing at all.

Once again, these are not resolutions. They’re goals. They’re things I would love to achieve this year. Some, like getting an agent, will likely not happen, if other years are any judge by. But it’s the trying that matters. I won’t get anywhere if I don’t try.

Honestly, if I just manage to try for most of these, I’ll consider that a win.

Wish me luck!

​Ciao!

Good morning, Readers.

Normally, in the second-last blog post of the year, I take a look back at what, on my list of goals I made for the year (not resolutions - goals) I've achieved, and what I failed to do, as sort of an accountability thing for myself.

Well, fuck that noise.

2020 crashed down on us all hard, and I know I didn't achieve anything that I wanted, and frankly, looking back at the goals considering what a trash-fire year this has been will likely only depress me or make me angry. I'm not okay with either of these things.

So, instead, I'm giving myself permission to flip the mother of all birds at the past year and my past goals, wipe the slate clean, and try again. I have a new situation, with a new schedule, and some new dreams, and I'm still finding my way.

I'm not looking back at my 2020 goals. I'm not.

So instead you just get this brief blog post, letting you all know that I'm not looking back at 2020. What I will be doing, is looking forward to 2021. But that's tomorrow's blog post.

For now, to everyone who didn't get near their goals, give yourselves a hug. It's enough that you're still here. You're enough as you are.

And fuck 2020, and every single politician and citizen who made it harder than it ought to be.

​Ciao!

Good morning, Readers!

I'm over at my art blog today, talking about the gifts I made for Christmas this year.

Good morning, Readers!

Gods, there are so many characters in this thing. This is the last of the lists before I start hitting the series reviews, and these aren't even all the characters I think you should be looking out for... just who I had time to squeeze in. 

Listen, this show is convoluted. It's part of why I love it so.  Anyway....

Jin Guangshan

THIS DICK.

His alignment is definitely Lawful Evil.

Fucking jerk.

All I have to say about him at present is that he is the patriarch of the Jin Clan, and he's a massive cunt.

​That is all.

Su She

Speaking of absolute fuckers, here is another. Su She. This fucker defected from the Lan Clan (you know, the elves of the Cloud Recesses (Lan Cheng and Lan Wangji's clan)) to begin his own clan of cultivators.

Horrendously jealous of Lan Wanji, everything Su She does mimics the former, but the man never could hold a candle to the Light-Bearing Lord.

So he turns into a monster and does unspeakable things.

Jesus, I hate him.

Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen

I love these two so much they get a .gif instead of a still. Introduced as 'best friends' I think they're best friends in the way that Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are best friends... Which is to say, lovers. They are in my head, and nothing you say will convince me otherwise.

They're lovely together.

Unfortunately, their story is tragic, as so many stories are in this series.

But I love them dearly, and in my head, they find one another again.

Lan Sizhui

While we're on pleasanter people, this adorable, kind-hearted boy made me happy.

I'm only including him here because he proves that not everyone who isn't one of the heroes of the story is utterly shit.

Yes... that's why.

I reckon he's Neutral Good... because I feel like he's cheeky enough to break a few rules.

Xue Yang

Aaaaaand we're back to absolutely psychotic fuckers.

That was a pleasant interlude.

This dude could use a therapist. Or a padded cell and a straight jacket. The havoc he wreaks just because of some candy... 

This one is Chaotic Evil.

He's so chaotic, in fact, that he brings about his own doom; but not before ruining it for fucking everyone.

Ugh.

Jin Guangyao

Okay, but... his dimples.  He's got the cutest dimples when he smiles!

It breaks my heart.

You'll understand when you watch the thing.

Nie Huaisang

Childhood friend of Wei Wuxian, Nie Huaisang is the sole heir, and later the Patriarch of the Nie Clan.

I would describe this loveable dear as True Neutral.
​
And he's far more clever than one might think.

Okay, that's it.  That's all I'm willing to divulge to you before the recapping of the episodes begin.

I hope you had fun reading what little I wanted to share. And I hope even harder that by now your interest is piqued enough that you have watched the series. Or, you know, you could discover it all by reading my blog posts... Though, for real, watch it.

​It's gorgeous.

Good morning, Readers!

I still need to wrap the gifts I made, so I shall keep this brief.

This is very difficult for most people this year. It hurts to be kept away from loved ones. Some people are struggling to even put food on their tables, or keep roofs over their heads this year.

I am very fortunate.

I get to see my loved ones (they are part of my permitted ‘bubble’), and I found a job in a field that is considered essential (construction), so I’m able to have a relatively normal Christmas this year. I know this isn’t the case for everyone, even most, and I just wanted everyone to know that I’m thinking of you, and keeping you in my heart.

A paltry thing, I know. It doesn’t help you any, when you’re hurting so. I wish I could do more. I wish I could send everyone money and gifts, food baskets and warm things this Christmas. My equivalent of ‘thoughts and prayers’ is nothing.

Perhaps one day I’ll be in an even more fortunate place, and I’ll be able to ensure many more people have food on their tables and roofs over their heads.

For now, all I have is my love, and a wish - that your Christmas Eve is filled with warmth and love, and that there is enough of that in the world that you can feel its soft, radiant glow wherever in the world you are.

​You are loved. We’ll see each other again soon. Hang in there.