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It's Weird Right Now

7/1/2020

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Good morning, Readers!
Picture
This wolf is sleeping. I am envious. Found this pretty photo manipulation on wallpaperbetter.com.
It's only day two being back at work, and things are weird for me.

Yesterday was a great day for me.  I wrote my blog post, wrote the article for Black Gate Magazine, queried five agents as per my schedule, and got in a French lesson.  Also, the Mukluks I ordered using the money I got for Christmas, and I love them very much. All told, it was a great day.

And yet....

Last night was terrible for me.  I've been having low level anxiety for a few days now, but last night it was bad.  Really bad.  Like, my chest was hurting and I couldn't sleep bad.  I've not had an anxiety attack in a long, long time, and I had forgotten how to cope.

I tossed and turned, and got frustrated.  I tried all kinds of things, save going out for a run, but only because it was cold out.  Eventually, well past the time I should have been asleep, I finally put on some nice music so I could give my mind something to latch on to and focus on instead of all the physical symptoms of the anxiety attack.  It seemed to have worked.  I finally slept.

It did mean, however, that I didn't have the energy to get up at the time I'm supposed to in order to practice my guitar.  So already my attempt at trying to build a schedule is wrecked.  I'll try again, of course, tomorrow, but I'm also getting sick, so there's that issue.

Today, as a result, is going to be rough.  Really rough.  I'm already tired.  I can't focus because of it.  And my anxiety is still present, sitting in the back of my mind, being troublesome.

I was really hoping to settle in and get some writing done. I promised myself that I'd finish the second book of my Avalon series soon, and damn it, I intend to.

So, on that note, I think I'll sign off here, feeling sorr for myself.

Hope you all have a btter day!

Ciao!
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    S.M. Carrière, a Celtic Studies enthusiast, writes fiction.  And this blog.

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